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My epiphany - MC Snukipuff Saves Hip-Hop!

About My epiphany

Previous Entry My epiphany Jun. 9th, 2013 @ 08:48 pm Next Entry
Realizing that people don't think logically or rationally is an ongoing shock to me, the implications are HUGE. It sort of turns my whole life upside down, and explains so much of what never made sense to me in the past. Infidelity, random violence, all acts of madness which I have witnessed make SO MUCH MORE SENSE when I realize that the people doing them were not what I can classify as truly conscious human beings aware of actions and consequences in a real sense. How can irrational creatures even HAVE a morality beyond "that which is told them" which really isn't so much a morality as it is "me no put penis in electric socket because it sting me!"
I guess this is arrogance or something, but I'm just baffled and, more than anything, I have a new awe and fear of people around me. Here's an excerpt from a chat I had with an old friend regarding my ex wife which I think makes some of my recent realizations a bit more clear.

Me: I am just now starting to realize that some people don't think logically, and it's a frightening thought to realize that I was married to a woman who essentially is, in my opinion, not a conscious human being. Having recovered from addiction by myself is a huge eye opener, and I am very sad to see now that my addiction prevented me from seeing this basic human weakness which I do not possess: the inability to objectively process information. That said, how can I even be certain that Gulie ever loved me in the way that I loved her since, as far as I can tell, she cannot grasp reality? Very unsettling stuff.
Although realizing that people are NOT logical or even CAPABLE of being honest is really helpful to me as it explains many of the things which I have seen that I have never been able to understand, like Gulie's infidelity just NEVER MADE SENSE to me. Now that I can see that she perhaps was not logical, lying may have seemed like a morally acceptable choice to her, so in her eyes it wasn't wrong at all. The implications are REALLY unsettling, actually. I definitely feel like an alien now.
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